We were strangers, starting out on journey, never dreaming, what we'd have to go through. Now here we are, and I'm suddenly standing, at the beginning with you...
(from the movie Anastasia - it totally reflects our lives. The first time I heard it I knew it had to be a part of our wedding)

Mike and I met through a mutual friend in the fall of 1991. I was working at a Correctional centre on a University work term and hung out in a bar every Friday night with a bunch of (mostly) female friends. Mike was usually there with his buddies. We actually started dating when John (a guy I worked with) was trying to ask Tracy (a friend of mine) out on a date. There were a group of us standing in a parking lot and when John started talking I said "I'm outta here" and walked over to Mike's truck. We were all standing around chatting and Tanya said "Jean, there's a buck and doe next weekend for Claudine, do you want to go? It's cheaper if you get a date". So I turned to Mike and said "so do you wanna be my date?" Months later he told me that he had wanted to ask me out, but was afraid I would say no. We went through some rough times (school, unemployment, distance, and different directions in our lives) but we managed to work through them. We are both fiercely independent people, but love each other deeply. As time went on more and more of our friends got married. Mike always joked that he would be last ~ and we almost are! In August 1999 we purchase a "previously enjoyed" home in St. George. I told Mike that I would not live with him unless I had a ring and or a date set. He though I was kidding until the day I moved into the house (November) and I reminded him that he was not living here with me without the goods. Mike asked me if I wanted "to make it official" on December 4, 1999. It wasn't the most romantic proposal, but it was genuine and that's what counts. I told him we had to tell my parents together and in person, so we told them on the Tuesday. My Mum figured something was up, but it took her a bit to figure it out. The first thing she said to Mike was "congratulations, it's about time". Throughout our announcing our engagement everyone either said "it's about time" or "what took you so long". Mike told his Mom in passing on Wednesday morning on his way to work. His dad actually found out through the grapevine at work (Mike's Dad, my Dad and I all work for the same company). Though Mike is their only son, his family was pretty blasé about the whole thing.

We started looking at wedding dates. I had wanted April (after being together for eight + years I wanted to get the show on the road!), but we had to work around Easter and another family wedding in March. Mike said the 29th was too close to planting season. (He farms for a living). So then it had to be after harvest was over. We had originally picked December 9th for our wedding date (I wanted a Christmas wedding), but because of circumstances, had to change it early in the planning stages. We then tossed around a few ideas and my Mum suggested the 18th of November. I wasn't too keen on the date as it is my Dad's birthday and I always felt you shouldn't "steal" someone's special day. After a couple days, my Mum told me that Dad would be happy if we got married on the 18th - so that settled it. After we were engaged a few months we found out that Dad's parents were married on my Great Grandma's birthday, Dad and Mum were married on Great Grandpa's birthday and we were married on Dad's birthday, which also happened to be Great Grandma and Grandpa's wedding anniversary!

The ceremony location was barely an issue. Mike doesn't attend church and I had grown up in Burford and attended the local United Church for 25+ years. We briefly tossed around the idea of being married in Mum and Dad's living room, but the logistics of fitting 40 people in there and then having a sit down meal didn't work out. Besides, I had always dreamed of walking down the aisle at a church. The minister (Rev. Terry Dunseith) has been at our church for 4 years. I really like him and Mike did too after he met him. Terry only met with us a couple times. We had to complete a questionnaire (are you fit to be tied?). Though it has a lighthearted title, it asked us questions about children, finances, family dynamics etc. Terry told us to answer the form separately and then discuss it . If we couldn't resolve anything on our own then he would be more than happy to help us through this.

Terry has also created a ceremony program where you choose a) b) or c) throughout to create a ceremony that is uniquely yours. Mike does not attend church so we chose to forgo communion. We had three solos, one Bible reading, a reading (that we chose) by the minister as well as his 2-4 minute "sermon". Part of the "package" at the church includes the programs. I did them up on my computer and then forwarded it to Terry, who then printed them for us. We chose the one that had "on this day I marry my friend" on it. Inside the program we included the wedding party, parents, ceremony details and on the back was our address and phone number.

Growing up in Burford, there are limited locations for wedding receptions (not that this is a bad thing). Blessed Sacrament Catholic Hall was the obvious choice. It is a beautiful facility that easily seats 400 guests. Decorating on our part would consist of the centrepieces, the guest book table and the gift table. The hall is always decorated with minilights, tulle, greenery and lattice work. The ladies who are in charge of the catering are family acquaintances. Once we got them around to our way of thinking for having the reception (40 people for dinner and 160 additional guests for a dessert reception) plans moved along quickly. The hall supplies the bartenders and the mix requirement, you supply the alcohol and license. The DJ was easy. Stan Pepper had DJ'd Junior Farmer dances for years and he was a great guy. Stan's wife Lois comes with him all the time. They make a great team because Lois loves country music and Stan hates it. Stan's collection includes waltzes, polkas, foxtrot, dance, alternative, rock... At our reception Stan told Mike that it was important to continue to take your wife out on "dates", their marriage was very happy because Stan takes Lois out every Saturday night (he DJ's most every Saturday night). It got a big laugh from everyone, but I think Mike was paying attention, as he will call me at work to see if I would like to "go out on a date with him for dinner".

At first Mike and I argued over the photographer. Mike did not want any pictures taken. Several of our friends had used Memory Lane from Paris, Ontario but he was charging more money than we wanted to spend. I agreed with Mike that we didn't want to spend a lot of money but wanted good quality pictures. I was on the Today's Bride website when Judy posted. I contacted Kristine Peacock about it (she had already met and booked with Judy) and after calming my fears, I contacted Judy and we were so pleased with the results! The price and package were exactly what we were looking for. After Judy and Darsi said goodbye to us at the wedding, Mike commented that it was so wonderful because we hardly knew they were there and yet they got great pictures. We had both been to weddings where the photographer was "in your face" and we didn't like that idea.

One of the first things Mike said to me in the planning was "whatever makes you happy dear". I think he began to regret those words because I would say "it would make me happy if..' For the most part I picked a couple things that I liked and then asked Mike to choose which one he preferred. He also told me "it's not that I don't care, I just don't care!!" He was getting frustrated with my obsessing over every little detail of the wedding. I am an organizer by nature and training so it was hard for him. He just goes with the flow and was certain that everything would just fall into place. To ease my mind and get me off his back, I made him a list of things he needed to do for the wedding and when I wanted them done for. I told him that they were his responsibility and that I was not going to mention them again. If they weren't done for the wedding, he would have to explain why. It worked for the most part. Picking a wedding party was easy. Because our wedding was fairly small, I only wanted one attendant (saved a lot of stress in the end!!) I chose a really close friend. Her Mom and my Mum are best friend's and she is like a baby sister to me. I called her at 6:30 in the morning to tell her we were engaged! The next weekend I went to visit her. On the Friday night we were sitting around talking and I said to her "So you'll be my Maid of Honour, right?" She cried. Karyn has been married for five years and she was a great help when I needed her. Thanks to Ma Bell and e-mail her living in Toronto and me in St. George was not an issue. Sometimes I swore we were sisters in previous life as I would say, "what do you think of.." And she would say "I was thinking the same thing!" You learn who your friends are when planning a wedding.

After Christmas I stocked up on red poinsettias and white roses. These were the main flowers for the wedding. My cousin's wife Karen did all the flowers for us as her gift to us! She did my bouquet, Karyn's candle, corsages and boutonnieres, pew bows, and candelabra decorations. They were beautiful! In March we went shopping for the material for my dress. Though Mum had said it would take her 12 weeks to make my dress (where she came up with that I have NO idea!!) but I was afraid that we would have to order in material and it wouldn't be on time if we waited until the fall to go shopping. We found a beautiful brocade material in white. It had roses on it and so we bought tiny white rose buttons to go down the back of the dress. The first thing my Dad said when we showed him the material was "Isn't that the same material you had? (meaning my Mum's dress) We got out her dress and her material was very similar. My Dad can't remember what he had for breakfast, but he remembers what my Mum wore 32 years before! My sister-in-law Chantal offered me her headpiece and veil. Her headpiece was a wreath with white porcelain roses. I chose to wear my Mum's veil with it.

My dress was so beautiful and was exactly what I wanted. At one point my Mum said to me that there were five different patterns in the dress and only one piece had not had to be altered in any way! My Mum made a lot of my clothes growing up and it was always my dream she would make my dress. The dress had fairly simple lines and no beadwork or lace work. We got a wedding dress from someone else and though it was not me, the crinoline was used on my dress. I thought we would have a lot of battles about "the dress" but we didn't. Both Mum and I have very definite ideas about what we want. I "stole" some of the material from all the outfits and made a shadow box for my Mum with a special poem in it about 'the wedding gown my mother made" It is a wonderful poem and it made my Mum cry (not that it was difficult in the days leading up to our wedding day!)

Karyn's Mom made her dress from black velvet. Karyn and I both loved the thought of black velvet at an evening service. Karyn suggested long black gloves (which I had wanted but didn't want to ask her to pay for) and it looked stunning on her! My Mum came home one night and said "who's idea was black velvet anyway?" I guess we weren't very popular with Karyn's Mom that day. Mary Lou had some problems with the sewing but in the end, wow it was worth it.

My Mum (in her free time) also made little velvet dresses for Mykaila (4 ½), Sydney (18 months) and Lisa (8 months). She also made Jeffrey (2 ½) a vest. The kids were so cute. Mykaila and Sydney have worn their "beautiful dresses" every time they get dressed up since! Mykaila's only request about the dress was "I have to be able to pick it up when I walk" She had seen too many Disney movies with those long flowing gowns to miss out on having her own.

My Mum bought her dress on a shopping trip to London. It was one of the first dresses she tried on. The dress was definitely not "mother of the bride". We had planned our wedding for evening, but not necessarily formal. I told Dad that he either could rent a tux, or buy a new suit. My father is so frugal that he would never rent a tux and he balked at buying a suit. My Mum reminded him that the last suit he bought was for his own wedding and that after 32 years, he could probably afford a new one!

We ordered our invitations in August. I looked at books from several vendors and had samples sent to me. I picked out about 12 that I liked and then had Mike pick the one he wanted out of those ones. We had seven wedding showers. The first one was the end of July when I hosted a surprise shower for a teammate from baseball and the team decided to get me too! It was a raunchy shower and a lot of fun. We had four family showers, one friend's shower and one for the ladies of the community. Though it was a lot of showers they were all much appreciated. I tried to get my thank you cards written the day after the showers so they would not pile up. People were impressed with how quickly I got them out and someone always had a horror story about never getting one from some other wedding.

The wedding party and our families hosted a Buck and Doe the long weekend in September. It was a great party and everyone had a blast! Karyn's Mom made the cake for the buck and doe (the first of many that she did for us) Karyn planned a girls night out. We went out for dinner and then to the Casino. Me, I lost money, but Karyn won enough to pay for all the expenses she had incurred that night, with at bit left over. That girl has luck when it comes to gambling. I was able to take the Wednesday - Friday off before my wedding. Though we didn't have a lot to do, it was nice to have the time off. Wednesday my Mum came over and we cleaned our house (we were having everyone over for the gift opening on the Sunday) Mum and I decorated the church on Thursday afternoon. All that consisted of was getting out the Advent candles, putting on the pew and candelabra bows and placing the 20 poinsettias I ordered from a local greenhouse at the front of the church. Friday morning the wedding party and family decorated the hall and went out for lunch. We put the centrepieces on the tables, set up the guest book table, gift table, put baskets of goodies in the washrooms and helped the ladies set the tables. We had our rehearsal on the Friday before our wedding as Karyn and her husband had to come from Toronto and the accompanist was coming from Feversham. It was very short and since we had all been in wedding parties before there weren't too many questions. Our rehearsal party was held in the basement at the church. Mike's Mom had wanted to have it at their house, but I didn't want to have the 30 minute drive to their house and 45 minute drive home later on. Mike's three sisters got together and bought appetizers from Zehrs and sweets and we had coffee and punch as well. It was nice and relaxing. We gave the wedding party, family, and special people who were a part of our day their gifts at the rehearsal party. Each of the gifts was individually chosen to reflect the person. We all went to bed fairly early. Because my brother, his wife and their two girls were down, Karyn stayed at her Mom's house on the Friday night. I had a great sleep and didn't wake up until about 6:00 a.m. on our wedding day.

After nine years, and one month, my dream became a reality. I married the best friend I could ever have. It was the best day of our lives! The whole day was perfect.

Almost everything was ahead of schedule (including Darsi and Judy being 1 1/2 hours early!!) My MOH (Karyn) and I got up early to go get our makeup done in Brantford and we dropped my car off for my brother (Scott) to drive home (he flew in from Fredericton). My Dad was getting really antsy because my brother was a lot later getting home than we anticipated (they were late because he and Mike were picking up a Lincoln Navigator! - Mike rented it as a surprise to tour the wedding party around for the day). When we got back from getting our makeup done we had coffee and goodies. The time went fairly quickly. Mum made a sort of special lunch since it was Dad's birthday. The hairdresser came to our house to do our hair and we looked great! My nieces, Mykaila and Sydney, were little darlings. They sat so well for Nicky to do their hair. Sydney is a little mimic so if we got Mykaila to do something, Sydney did it too. The little girls were the stars of the show. Judy got a really cute picture of Mykaila with my headpiece on.

Judy and Darsi were way early but it was a good thing as the little girls got familiar with them, and Judy got some great shots. I didn't feel rushed at all about any of it. We had our pictures taken by the fireplace at my parents and then Judy, Darsi and I went outside for a few shots. I didn't feel cold at all, though Darsi said she was freezing. We had coffee and goodies again just before leaving for the church. A close friend sent over two chefs aprons for Karyn and I to wear so we wouldn't get our dresses dirty! Judy and Darsi left to take pictures of Mike's family at the church. We had decided that it would save time as Mike's family lives 30 minutes from the church. They had some great photos and it looks like they were having fun.

Chantal said that I would be the calmest one on our wedding day, and I think I was. Mum and I had planned every last little detail - how could anything go wrong? I didn't feel at all nervous until we got to the church. At 4:45 I was sitting outside the church going "let's get the show on the road!!! I couldn't wait to see Mike's face and become his wife. I had waited so long for this day, I couldn't believe it was actually, finally here!!! Mark (Karyn's husband) drove Karyn and me to the church. We were sitting outside and Mark said "so are you nervous yet?" I started to cry! All of a sudden it hit me - I'm getting married!" Mike's sister Carolyn light the candelabra at the front of the church just before the ceremony started. Mike seated his mother and my brother seated my Mum to "Largo" which is the song that my Mum came down the aisle to at her wedding. The mother's lit the family candles at the front of the church. I didn't feel nervous at all, until they started Trumpet Voluntary with the Trumpet playing from the balcony. Karyn had asked that I not come down the aisle until she got right to the end and was in position. She carried a beautiful candle with flowers and was setting it on the front table. Since we only had the two of us, it didn't matter to me. I couldn't see, but I guess Mike was peeking up the aisle trying to see me but my Dad kept me back out of view. I didn't cry but several people mentioned that I looked nervous. One thing that we did differently was that the four of us stood on the platform at the front of the church, facing the congregation while the minister stood off to the side, basically with his back to the congregation. Several people mentioned that they liked that they could see our faces.

The soloist (Gail) was perfect. She sang "At the beginning" as soon as Dad and I got the front of the church. Because she is a close friend, it meant all that much more to me. We both said our vows (Mike tripped over the word faithful). It's a good thing the minister said them before us because you can hardly hear me on the video! My brother read from 1 Corinthians (I read it at his wedding). The minister's sermon was short, sweet and very meaningful. Our minister talked about how we were now a couple but that we were also still individuals and that should never change. Though I don't remember much of it, when watching the video it comes back to me.

We signed the register at the front of the church while the accompanist (a very close friend, Barb) played "Shine Jesus Shine" a song that I learned on a youth group trip to England. It meant a lot to Karyn, Barb and I as I had been their chaperon on that trip. Gail then sang "Perhaps Love". It was so beautiful. I kept tearing up throughout the service and Mike told me to stop as he was going to start! It was such and emotional time and I couldn't believe that all our family and friends were actually there to support us as we said our vows.

I had asked for a blessing to be sung by Gail at the end of the service. It is the one usually sung in our church after a baptism (Would the Lord bless and keep you.). I totally lost it when my Mum got up with the soloist and sang the blessing at the end!! Only four people knew she was going to do that (Mum had told no one in case she couldn't do it). It was so remarkable. Mike just held my hands tight as the tears ran down my face (Niagara Falls has nothing on me!).

Next thing I knew we were having our first kiss (I think that was one of the first times we ever kissed in front of our parents!!!) and Rev. Terry was announcing Mr. and Mrs. Mike and Jean Welton. We walked out of the church to "Air in G" under a shower of bubbles (thanks to friends from university, who think of everything!) We had our pictures taken in the church and they turned out beautiful. Friends had their photos developed at the one hour photo so we actually got to see them on Sunday afternoon. We weren't rushed at all during picture taking and were done in plenty of time. I think it was really to our advantage that we only had a MOH and a BM to deal with for pictures. Though we had 4 small children, for the most part they were well behaved. We had arranged to have munchies available during the picture taking as it was around supper time and I didn't want people to be starving waiting for dinner.

Dinner was wonderful. Our meal was served family style. We had only 36 for dinner and we actually got to enjoy the food and fellowship. The wedding party and their spouses sat at the head table and then we had three tables of 10 fanned out from it. Once dinner was over the three tables were removed and the family moved to other tables for the reception. Our meal was roast beef, parsley potatoes, carrots, cabbage rolls, salad, rolls and pickles. Mike had decided that to have us kiss, we would have people clink their glasses. Throughout dinner we could hear this little voice saying "kiss Aunt Jean, kiss Aunt Jean". The parents were getting our nieces and nephew to do it!

We had 160 more guests join us for a dessert reception. Mike's Mom and my Mum made cherry and blueberry cheesecake for the dessert. It is Mike's and my favourite dessert. Couples from the church came and served the dessert and coffee for us. It was a great way to have friends of my parents involved in our wedding. They were all invited to stay for the rest of the evening. My Uncle made peach wine (it was to die for) and another Aunt and Uncle grow blueberries and had wine made (it was even better). My Mum made grape juice for those who didn't want wine. This was used for the toasts during speeches. We chose to have an open bar after the dessert and speeches were over. Our MC was Dave (Mike's cousin's husband). He did an excellent job and kept everything flowing very well.

The speeches were hilarious and funny and sad all at the same time. The Best man and Maid of Honour spoke as well as both my parents (Dad was short sweet and to the point!). Mike's Dad spoke and then my brother. My brother (as far as I am concerned) was the highlight. He put together a Power point presentation on the "Care and Maintenance of Jean". He is a Sergeant in the military and so based it on a military style lecture. He put the presentation together at home in Petawawa and then sent it to my Dad via e-mail and promptly crashed my Dad's computer and also caused some havoc with his own. He then left for a training course in Gagetown, New Brunswick and my Dad had to put the presentation together down here and prayed that it would go off without a hitch. He had gone through all the old picture albums and found some great ?!?! shots of me (us) growing up together. This was payback time for me "roasting" him at his wedding five years earlier. I spoke before Mike because I told him he might have to take over for me if I got too emotional. My speech was rather long as I had so many people to thank for everything they had done. Chantal cried throughout my speech and I couldn't look at her for fear of starting myself.

The dance got started a little later than I had hoped. But that was the only thing that went "wrong". Mike chose our first dance, and I chose our last dance. Mike and I danced to "Best day of my life" sung by George Strait. And I truly believe it was the best day of our lives. I waited my whole life for someone like Mike and it was well worth the wait!!! As my cousin said, "Your wedding day is almost surreal. It's like you are watching from above." It was like "Is this really happening?!?" We had our families dance next to "Angels Among Us" sung by Alabama. We decided to have our families dance because we only had a Maid of Honour and Best Man and we also wanted to acknowledge the work that our families had done for our wedding and how much we appreciated them.

I danced with my Dad to "Daughter of Mine" - John McDermott's version. We had heard this song at two weddings we had been to this summer and it's the one Dad wanted. It was a wonderful waltz and we had the whole dance floor to ourselves! We both were doing okay until the very end and then my Dad started to tear up and I cried! The DJ said he had seen a lot of father / bride dances before but that was the best one he had ever seen. If any of you is looking for a song and you are close to your Dad, I highly recommend it. I felt like the belle of the ball on my Dad's arm! We practiced the week before the wedding dancing together. It really made a difference.

We had the cake cutting, garter toss and bouquet toss all at once. We had the garter toss to the song from the Bloodhound gang My garter was made of the navy material in Chantal's dress. Instead of tossing my bouquet to one girl, I had all the ladies, married or single on the dance floor. When I threw my bouquet it came apart and each person got a little of it. (though I notice in the pictures that it is mostly single ladies out there.)

For the guest book, we had a friend take pictures of each couple, and then they wrote in a book. We will put the pictures next to the quotes they left for us. It was an idea we borrowed from a friend at their wedding. We didn't get pictures of everyone because we didn't have people sign as they came into the hall. For favours we had teddy bears that my dad had cut out and Chantal, Karyn and I painted for the ladies. They could be hung on your Christmas tree. For the men we made Antipasta or Salsa. The children each had a plastic wine glass with crayons in it and then we had colouring books for them to play with during the speeches. We placed each of these on the tables so people could pick them up before they left. I spent quite awhile doing the seating plan and we assigned people to tables, but not specific seats. The night passed much too quickly and even though we had a great time, Mike and I both wish it could have lasted longer. I tried to stop and look at everything, but it was hard. We had a receiving line and though it took a lot time I would highly recommend it. It was a way to actually speak to everyone that was there. We had our receiving line as people started into the late night buffet. We both didn't have anything from the buffet. We were married on my Dad's birthday so the buffet had a birthday cake on it. As people passed through the receiving line we gave them a small bag with a red, white and chocolate teddy bear in it.

Before we knew it, Stan was announcing that it was our last dance. One thing Mike did NOT want was to have everyone stand in a circle around us and run in and out as we danced. So we had Stan invite everyone to join us in our last dance. We danced to "Love the way you love me" sung by Faith Hill. The lights came on and people made their way home. Mike and I stayed to help clean up - we did not want the party to end!

We stayed in our own home on our wedding night and had everyone over the next day for the gift opening. About 30 people actually came. We served the leftovers from the midnight buffet. We were both very tired after everyone left. After the hustle and bustle of the last few days, we were glad to be alone! After everyone left, we threw some clothes in the boxes, hopped in the truck and headed to Fenlon Falls for our honeymoon. I slept most of the way there, though I did wake up long enough to have supper at Swiss Chalet. We woke up Monday morning to 4 inches of snow. It was the most perfect way for us to spend our honeymoon. We went out for breakfast he first day as we had taken no groceries with us - and had an interesting time meeting some of the locals. We had a cottage with a gas fireplace, hardwood floors, great kitchen, barbeque and we took two ATV's with us. We did whatever we wanted and didn't feel one bit of guilt as we spent Friday watching Dukes of Hazard! We headed to Petawawa for the weekend to see my brother and his family. We got home about 6 on Sunday and both were very disappointed to have to go back to work. We told Dave and Wendy (cottage owners) that we wanted to book the cottage for a weekend next November. I certainly hope it becomes an anniversary tradition!

Vendors

Ceremony location - Burford United Church - Burford Ontario - Minster Rev. Terry Dunseith
Reception venue and meal - Blessed Sacrament Catholic Hall
DJ's - Stan and Lois Pepper
Wedding Cake - Cakes by Donna
Flowers - Karen Waltham (cousin of the bride)
Shoes -Tootsies Factory Shoe Outlet
Material for wedding dress, MOH dress and little girls dresses and accessories - European Textiles
Photographer - Elementz of fotographie (Judy and Darsi)
Video - Stephen Duncan - family friend
Transportation - Lincoln Navigator - budget rent a car - Toronto
Hair - Nicky from the Hair Works
Makeup - Olivers
Nails - pro Nails
Wine - Uncle Len and Aunt Eileen (peach wine), Uncle Paul and Aunt Laurel (blueberry wine)
Grape juice - Brant Food Centre - Mum bottled it
Favour and centrepices supplies - Wal-Mart, White Rose, Michael's
Favours - Terry and Anne Robinson, Chantal Robinson, Karyn Peterson, Diane Welton, Lynn Fair, Sandi Guy all helped make them
Centrepieces - made myself with help from Lisa Lepore Gift baskets for people who helped me - made myself with help from Lynda Charters, Nancy Kieler, Laura Mackisoc-Johnston and Lisa Lepore.
Invitations - Invitations by Dawn - little boy and girl in a field - Today I will marry my friend..
Honeymoon - Dave and Wendy Brenn's Cottage - Fenlon Falls, Ontario